After the last bullying incident, Becket started to tell me all the little incidents of his day. I told him to blow off the small stuff because you don't want to be a tattle, but if somebody hurts you then you should tell a teacher.
Well, when we were in the car yesterday, I asked Becket how things were going at school and he started to talk. First it was little stuff, like who got a bad mark and Jackson telling him how much stronger he was, but then he started talking about bigger issues. BIG ISSUES. I mean, showing your privates to others at recess issues. Yes, it makes you wince, but Mat and I both recalled a time when this happened to us in our early years of grade school. You want to ignore it like it never happened but we all know this VERY poop does indeed happen.
One of these same boys also pulled down Becket's pants while he was hanging from the monkey bars causing everyone else to laugh at him. Becket's crying now in the car, "They were all laughing at me and they wouldn't stop laughing!" "What did you do?" I asked. "I just walked away." He was afraid that he was going to get in trouble by the teacher.
Obviously we have a problem, a bigger problem than just tattling and petty 1st grade stuff. I had to make a decision on what to do. I don't like to step on the teacher's toes and be one of those parents that fight every battle for their kid, yet this was serious enough that I couldn't sweep it under the rug either. So, I called my mom, the veteran school teacher. She listened, while I cried. I'm glad she can still be my shoulder even if it is at a distance and I'm glad I have access to her wisdom. She gave me some ideas on how to approach it and I presented my ideas to her which we carefully planned and thought out.
I am happy to say that this incident is resolved for the most part. Gotta love communication. I believe it is the downfall of our entire society. Sometimes talking it out and being on the same page makes all the worry and assumptions go away. Becket's breathing! Becket's teacher is aware now and he knows that she is his advocate. He doesn't have to live under his backpack trying to deal with 1st grade life in his complex, deep mind, and I am at ease knowing he can pack away his anxious behavior and he can finally let his moppy blond hair blow carefree, for the first time in a long while.
I love you Becket.
(your trying hard, yet not so overbearing mother)
10 comments:
Oh this makes my heart hurt. Becket's such a sweet kid.
That's it...I'm never sending my kids to school!
Gah! I have heard of this happening to a friend's kid. I know they are at recess, but aren't there supposed to be teachers keeping an eye out? I would think a pants-less kid would stick out. Darn this crazy world we have to raise kids in! You're doing great, Mic.
This post made me so sad- for Beckett. My heart goes out to him. Luckily we haven't had to deal with bullying yet. You're a great mom. We have to be their best advocate.
Listen Mic. I know it would be irresponsible for you as the mother to do anything rash but I know some people who know some people.....I am just saying. If this happens again.....give me a call. I love you Becket!
Sure am glad you had your very smart mom to help you, Mic. I would have gone straight to Dan's people who know people!!
Give that moppy head a big rub for G. A & G. B. We love you all dearly.
Poor kids. I think you did the right thing. Communication is always a good thing! It breaks my heart when things like this happen.
I meant to say "poor kid." Becket is so sweet.
Mic my heart goes out to you. My oldest was bullied from 2nd grade through 4th grade. It is SO frustrating as a Mom because you want to protect them and you don't understand WHY the people who are suppose to protect them when you aren't there are missing what you would think to be the obvious.We too had to step in but it took me getting mean for things to changeLast year things changed because all the bullies were in a different class and he was able to go to school and not worry about what was going to happen. His confidence did a complete turn around and even though several of those bullies are in his class this year they have not bothered him, mostly because he is a different kid and not a target anymore. It was heartbreaking to go through and I really hope the best for your Becket.
Where is recess duty!??!! Seriously, that should not be happening to a 1st grader. Poor Beckett, move to SLC and put him in Karate. In 6th grade my brother was having issues so my dad taught him how to make someone's nose bleed with one hit. The next day he showed the guys his stuff and never had anymore problems. I'm sort of violent, hu? Hang in there, and really move here!
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