It's different this year...

I walked outside to find this gleaming at me and smiled. Mat had made this for me with his own two feet, before my morning jog. As I was walking back, I kid you not, the lamp posts on our street all turned on at once! Mind you it's morning, the lamp posts should be turning off, but I think because it was my birthday, they knew. Oh! They knew! I thought quietly to myself, this year is different. Let me explain:

December birthday people between the 20th-31st can only sympathize with me at this point. Wouldn't it be nice to have a birthday in March or September when nothing is going on and you need a party? As a child, I always thought these would be good months to stick my birthday in. In these months, you need an excuse to have some cake instead of getting rid of all the Christmas goodies! So, I constantly have to battle with my one time of year saying, "It's okay, it's a busy time of year for a birthday." I usually resort to wearing a tiara the whole day,dragging my despairing self around, and repeating the story of my birth for anyone who will listen. What's that you say, you didn't hear it?

Briefly, my mom is in the hospital room, right, giving birth. I come out and the doctors panic. I'm blue, not moving, and not breathing. There was no time for a "It's a girl!" cheer. My mother was frightened. 9 mths and I might lose her were her thoughts. The cord was wrapped around my neck four times. FOUR TIMES ! (that's for emphasis when I tell it in person). I was whisked away and placed into the incubator for a few days until I fought my way to live. Ahhh! It always feels good to tell that story. I know you have all missed it.

Anyway, this year I am finally satisfied. I think I don't need my tiara. No pity parties or self wallowing. I'm okay, you're okay. My family goes out of their way each year to make me feel loved and not forgotten. My childhood wounds have heeled. 32, I'm finally grown up!

PS: Mat-I bought a sweater last year from Costco and haven't worn it until today because there was a slight guilt over my splurge. I wore it today because I figured you couldn't be mad at me on my birthday.